After School

The bus passed him when he was on the wrong side of the road, despite his best efforts. "Oh shit" would have been his go-to phrase, but this happened so many times before, it didn't really come off as a surprise. He slowly started walking the opposite way from the bus stop, staring at the ground. The old cracked and faded surface pitifully trying to let off a little heat it's absorbed through the day, but the black tar was now only a grey crag. As he looked up, a motorbike who was obviously going too fast and too close to the side walk brushed against his arm. The driver of the bike turned to look back at him  as he sped past and put up two fingers, as if to say "peace". Except his hand was the wrong way around. It was at that moment that the driver ran into the front of a lorry waiting at the traffic light, at the bottom of the hill which led up to school. The lorry contained 4 cylinders, each of which filled with gasoline. At first the boy thought some massive, perhaps even "epic" (he hates that word) explosion would happen. But no.

No, that took about 7 seconds after the initial impact. It probably wouldn't have been so bad, but the motor biker was smoking too. What an idiot. The blast radius was large enough to hit him, and he fell down an open drain, rushing with dirty water and red curry. This helped extinguish the flames that were burning him, leaving him relatively unscathed. The same, unfortunately, could not be said for the biker. What a shame.

As the fire ensued, he was pulled by the current of the disgusting drain liquid and poured out into the sea across the street. At least he was on the right side of the road now. His hair smelt like school lunch and his left hand was a charcoal black. He always did find it hard to tan, but this seems to have been an exception. The crusty skin crackled as he stretched his fingers, which surprisingly didn't hurt. Odd. Instead there was a funny kind of tingling where is fingernails used to be. One could liken it to the feeling of sticking your fingers into a jam jar filled with bees and jam.

He brushed himself off after getting out of the jellyfish infested ocean, and decided to walk out through the main hotel lobby which the beach front belonged too. No one seemed to really notice the boy with the permanently shadow-cast left arm and only half a face. Oh yeah, he only has half a face. Probably should have mentioned that. When he got out, he noticed the next bus was just around the corner. He casually walked up to the bus stop down the street, placed out his thumb, and hopped aboard. Whereupon he wasn't even charged a dime.

What a convenient stroke of luck.

Accomplished.

This is it. I did it. My biggest accomplishment to date.

Finished my ToK preparation? No.

Finished that English essay? Nah.

Finished one of the many songs I have on the go right now? Nope.

Finished my uni applications and got accepted anywhere? Not even close!

No, this is by far greater than all of these things.

I, ladies and gentleman, have reached top comment status on YouTube. That's right. 47 likes in a day. And I'm still on top. Awwwwww yeeeeeeeeeeaaaaaaah. Ain't nothin' that can stop me now. I feel invincible. Untouchable. Unintelligjhgajfhlklable.

And it feels great.

Oh yeah by the way this is sorta kinda definitely my 100th post too, so yeah, ya know, woo, no big deal though. Let's be modest about this, shall we?

Here(no-space)We(no-space)Go

Okayherewegooffintothewildgreenyonder,andbythatIobviouslymeantheshowwe'reabouttoplayatstraitsquay.It'sgonnabeprettysweetIguess,sinceIsawthemsetupthestagelastnight.Exceptmyvoiceiskindafeelingalittlescrewedrightnow,soIjusthopenothingbadhappens.NotthatitwouldreallymakeadifferenceanywaythoughIdon'tthink.SincehalfthetimeI'maliiiittleoffkeyanyway.PlusIdon'tthinkanyonesuperimportantiscomingtowatchthiseither,soit'sallforshitsandgiggles.Wow,I'veneversaid"shitsandgiggles"before,andtobehonestIwasn'texactlythrilledbyit.Ahwell.I'mhomealonerightnow,physicallyandemotionally,huuhuuuhuuu,sohopefullyI'llbeabletoconveythatkindofemotiononstagetonight.Imeanit'sonlyatenminuteslot,andwe'reonlyreallyplayingonesong,butmeh!It'sgiveitallornothinginthesekindofthingsalwaysforme,andInevergivenothing.I'mexcitedforthis.Aretherestofmybandmates,Idunno.Ihopeso,causewe'reaaaaaalllinthistogether.I'malonelyboywithoutthem.ButthenI'dstillbeaftertheshowanyway.Ohwoahwoahwoahwell,I'mexaggerating.Asyoudoonablog.Yaknow,Itwouldn'tbeablogiftherewasn'tsomeformofexaggeration.Ilikehowthiswholepagenowisjustonehugeredsquigglyline.That'swhyIdiditlikethis.Notforsomestupidsymbolicpurpose,notcauseI'mtalkingrealfast,it'salljustcauseIlikethered.Sowithoutfurtheradieu,Ibidthee,adieu.

Real Talk

So.. Guess where I'm writing this one.

In school! Fwohhh, so rebelious, I know.

I'm trying to solidify some of my gooey brain matter into written form for the magazine I write for. Kind of like how I write in this blog. So, I think I'm just gonna be cheap and post up here what I've written for there too. I can't tell if these are "magazine worthy" though.

Which is your favourite, if any!?

Someday, cars’ll be so fast, that by the time we start them, we would have never left.

If you have nightmares at night, does that make a bad day dream, a daymare?

Positive = negative, really. You just got to swap around the posi’s and nega’s.

 

What’s the question, to the answer in your mind? If you can answer that, I’ll give you 10 bucks^*

Your latest memory is you reading this very sentence, right now. I guarantee.

There’s a fiiiine line between not minding, and not having a mind.

Whalers whale, Sailors sail, but tailors… Tail?

Philosophy is really just masturbation for the brain.

^{*Just kidding.}

Piss Town

Im standing, waiting for a bus as i write this right now. Normally I'd have things to do than this 10 bloody minutes after school, but there's a problem, you see.

I am reeeeaaally busting to take a piss right now. And it's torture.

Luckily as soon as i wrote that, the bus came. But it's not like there's any toilets on this thing. On the bright side, at least Im now heading towards the direction of a toilet. This thought comforts me.

Awgh, shit! A bunch of people are getting on at the bus stop across from Maccas. Hurryyyy uuup. Aaaahhh. They're arguing over how much to pay. It's one ringgit for crying out loud!

Oh great, as soon as we move, the red light hits.

Go go go, yeeeaaah. Finally got some momentum. I just hope there's no road work like there was yesterday. That made us stay in the bus for about 30 minutes i think. Doouuuble the normal time. It was fine yesterday since i could talk to my friend. But now Im just talking to myself...

Kind of like a crazy person, I suppose. Except Im not speaking out loud, disturbing other people with my delirium. That's me. The considerate crazy.

Gah, Im not crazy. Just distracting myself from my bladder.

So far so good. In the middle of the mountain now and no sign of traffic. Peeeerfeeeect. Im pretty disappointed though with myself today, cause I ate a puppy.
Loljkyolo!
I really just forgot my shoes for running today. Which is a shame, because I enjoy running. Ah well, next week.

Oh, oh, so guess what? There's the same traffic jam! Cause some fucking genius decided the best time to do road work would be in the BUSIEST TIME OF THE AFTERNOON. Yeah, that's really intelligent, I can see the logic behind this. Because what's the point of life if you can't piss off a fuck-load of people, right? Not to mention there's been this beeping noise the bus has been making since before i got in it.

*beep* *beep* *beep* *beep*

Over and over, no breaks. This is some hardcore beeping right here, people! Let's give it a round of applause! No? How about a round of machine gun bullets? Yeah, figured that'd be the more popular vote.

So there's this creep guy sitting in the seats made for old and/or disabled people (of which he's neither) staring up and down this girl in front of him. She doesn't realise cause she's got her back turned to him. Perfect for both of them i guess! He gets to stare at her, and she doesn't have to notice it. Everybody wins. Except for, ya know, justice.

Oh goody, we moved 5 feet.

I was planning to just write this for the whole trip, but I'd be able to write a full EE in the time it's gonna take to get home. So Im ending this here. Because I haven't even finished my actual EE yet!

Ps. I just caught the creep guy staring at me now when i looked up.

Huh?

What's that, you say?

A ToK practice presentation, you say?

Tomorrow, you say?

I don't have anything, you say?

I'm gonna wake up at 5 30 tomorrow morning, you say?

I'm tired right now, you say?

This is really bad, you say?

This is borderline disastrous, you say?

But this isn't the end of the world, you say?

Everything else that's to come is, you say?

How was your day, you say?

Only kidding i don't care about that, you say?

I'm gonna go gorge myself with ice cream, you say?

You should just give up now, you say?

Yeah, well, you know what?

Fuck you!

Hah.

Bagged Cats

Oh boy, I do love me some cold beef and bacon burger. And Im not even kidding! I just ate one. I don't know why Im so hungry lately, but I am!

Also, the cat's totally out of the bag. Now Im just kinda watching it, waiting for it to piss all over the place. Cause that's just what cats seem to do when Im around.

So.. What next then? Your move I guess.

Pathetique

Soooo.

It's been about half an hour since I've tried to fall asleep. And it seems Im getting nowhere! Hah, but like that's anything new.

Yesterday was sports day, and to be honest it was pretty fucking embarrassing. I threw up during the 1500 metre race... Twice! Luckily it was during the last lap. But it was still annoying. Especially considering a whole number of people could have seen it too.

After that I had high-jump. Now that was actually something i used to really like to do. 2 years ago. But since then it seems my form has gotten pretty sloppy. The bar also seemed to be a lot harder than past years.. After bashing into it twice for 130 cm and thrice for 140, it actually bruised my back. Hah.

Overall the experience kinda just left me feeling pretty pathetic.. Threw up in front of the whole school, and bruised my back on some tiny yellow rod. Oh well i guess. Its all over now. No room to dwell. But, still. It was pretty sucky.

For some reason today i was really on edge too. I had a mini freak out when this guy came up and touched my shoulders unexpectedly out of nowhere. It just made twitch and then flip out.. Why? Maybe it's stress or something. Anxiety manifestation. Who knows. Maybe i just don't like being randomly touched. I acted pretty strange during band practice too.. And i couldn't quite place a finger on why. But then hey, I was too far gone to stop then and there!
I really wish practice time was longer though. At least an hour. Is that so much to ask? Apparently so.

Well, I'm hoping tomorrow's gonna be fun. It probably will be. Even if I'll be doing something I've never done before...

Peel

Picking scabs is better than writing this essay.

Writing this essay is better than peeling off your toe-nail.

Peeling off your toe-nail is better than banging your head against a brick wall.

Banging your head against a brick wall is better than stepping on a rusty nail.

Stepping on a rust nail is better than getting crabs.

Getting crabs is better than falling asleep on a bed of lobsters.

Falling asleep on a bed of lobsters is better than thinking about the future.

Thinking about the future is better than social anxiety.

Social anxiety is better than picking scabs.

Picking scabs is better than writing this essay.

See! You just gotta look at it all in perspective! Who am I even talking to? Me I guess.

HAHA JK, MAN, JK. NOTHING IS BETTER THAN PICK SCABS. LAWL.

Escapade

I've been getting this overwhelming feeling of wanting to get the fuck out of here.

Let's go.

Achievement

So, I beat Assassins Creed 2 today. And when i did that, i felt pretty good. Kind of like "yeah, this is great. I've accomplished something today." And the piece of shit world suddenly turned into a big rose tinted piece of shit. That lasted for about an hour. Right up until i remembered who i was and then had to interact socially within a large group of people.

2 people i can handle. 3, sure. 4, okay maybe it's stretching the comfort mark now, but still i think I'd be capable. But then there comes a point where there's a lot of people. And its not that i don't like being around all the people, i do. It's just it seems increasingly difficult to speak out and join one large-ass conversation.

So then i just kinda find myself in amidst all this talking. And it feels really hopeless and i just don't know what to do. So then i pretty much disconnect from it all.. Cause it feels reeaally stressful for some reason. One root of anxiety i just can't clip off. Unfortunately life isn't only a one-on-one conversation. Does that happen to anyone else? All my friends seem to be social butterflies though ahah.

But anyways, this made me wonder about what I've really "achieved" today. And really in the grand scheme of my life, not really anything. Its not like i made some huge social change with myself, or i did any homework, or anything like that! I just beat a good game that's 4 years old. And ya know, maybe that doesn't sound very impressive to you reading this now, and maybe it isn't, but i had fun doing it. So in my eyes, i think it's still an accomplishment. An achievement in the sense that I was able to sit down a few hours a week and carry on with something to completion.

I was gonna say this can sum up my life, but I'd be lying. Of Course I've given up on stuff before. Who hasn't? Sometimes futility can just be way too much to bear.

But screw dat sheet. I ain't gonna give up now. Im an assassin beeotch. Deal with it.

Wa-Bam

Holy shit, it's November. I know it's 7 days in it already, but it's kind of only just hit me now. It's November. Two more months and we're back in January. Only this time it won't be doing the same old shtick any more, since we dive right into mocks.

Just thought I'd put that out there.

All this thought about a new year though. It got me thinking about my new year's resolutions that I wrote out on this blog so organized, so many months ago. I totally forgot about them. Can't even remember what they were.

Oh yeah, I remember now.

Something about finishing my album, and not shaving until I do. Haahahah. Well, I did shave. But, I also did finish my album. Kind of not really. I don't know. It is finished. Just, not EVERYTHING is recorded. So then, it's not finished. Damn it. I must finish it. I MUST.





I wrote that 4 days ago. So, uh, woops. I think I didn't publish it cause I didn't really accomplish anything, and then I just ran out of things to say. woopsy-fuckin'-doodle, eh?

Lefty

This is my right hand right now, and i gotta tell ya, it's a right mess. Im right handed too, so right now Im just hoping I'll be able to write tomorrow about the right thing for Greece to do in econs.

 Im even typing this with my not right hand, and it just feels not right. 

Not right at all.

Sticky Fingers

Mmm, yes, that's what happens when you stick your hand in a jar of jam. Do you like jam? I quite like jam. Oh yes, quite so. Jam is just one of those wonders of nature. I bet Insane Clown Posse would call it a Miracle. Don't get me wrong, I'm not as stupid as them, but there's just something about preserved fruit that I find ever so fascinating.

Speaking of jam, I've always wanted to jam with so many different people. It makes me wonder if I ever will. Only time can tell I suppose. After today, anything seems possible! Hah, well, "anything", but not anything. If you catch my drift. Which, I'm sure you do. It's pretty hard to miss. Just look for the trail of jam.

UGH. I HATE FARMVILLE REQUESTS.

I don't have any qualms that people play it, but do they have to tell me about it all the time? Do they have to keep sending me requests, telling me to join it? Hey here's a crazy idea, why don't we sit down, have a few jars of jam, and talk about the damn game first. Make me interested, then maybe I'll consider wasting my time on that stupid game. It's like going up to some random person on the street you don't even know, giving them a jar of jam, and then running away. If I was that person, I'd be very confused, and wouldn't know whether or not to eat the jam. Cause you can jammify other stuff other than fruit you know. Like, toe jam for instance. Ever thought about that? I have, and it's disgusting. But to be honest, I've never even seen what toe jam looks like, it just sounds gross. It'd probably give you sticky fingers too if you dip your hand in a jar of it.

I like strawberry jam, blueberry jam, chicken jam, roast Salisbury steak jam, plum jam, apricot jam, fried onion jam, black pepper jam, Pot of Basil jam, jam from the concentrated urinary tract of a pig, jumbalya jam. All sorts! Yum yum! Jam for all, jam for all!

Speaking of jam, there's a terrible bio write up just waiting for me to write up. But you see, I'm in a bit of a jam. My printer is in the jam-mobile over down yonder, helping out a jam concert in the jam factory where they produce jam. So, i said, okay, fine, i get it, you're in a jam, you're out of jam, and you want some jam (cause they're hungry of course, this jam is 7 hours and 52 minutes long), so i said to them, I said to them hey, if you're in such a jam, don't be a jam, just kick out the jams. Go back to that there jam factory, plug in the printer, and get the ball rolling. But then, they told me right, that the jam is too thick, it's too sticky, they can't U-turn. So I said, hold your horses son, are you saying it's a sticky jam? Well you better be careful cause i gotta tell ya that sticky jam ain't for no second-rate jam catchers I'll tell ya that yes I will. They just said waitaminute waitaminute, we gots an idea. I told 'em well don't tell me we gots an idea, go on and spit 'em out, you got jam in your ears or summin'? So they told me there's a power point in the car thats in the sticky jam way out down in yonder. So greeaaat, i said. I said, greeeaaat. Just jam it right in then and let's get this ball rolling, quoting myself from earlier see? So then they jam it in the jam hole where they jammed it real hard and there was this buzzing noise, kinda like a fridge that only holds jam, and they were like, woah man, we don't know how to tell ya this, but the printer. It's jammed.

HOOHOOHOOOOOO, that was hilarious. I don't know where i was going with that, but I went there and i got there HARD. Aw yeah, that felt real good.

I love stories. Expect more some day.

Screw it

Okay, here's something I recorded a few days ago. It's just a demo, so, yeah, it's not perfect. But nothing's perfect, so gimme a break. It's called Spineless. Originally it was called Spineless Scumfuck, but then I realised that's just too damn depressing, even for me. It's a song about me, go figure. I wrote this during a pretty dark time in my emotional existence. It's basically the product of a destructive relationship. There's another song to go with it, called "uhh, I don't actually have a title yet", but whatever, I haven't even finished that one yet. So, without further adieu, my song, Spineless.

Spineless Download woot woot

Let me know what you think.