Pathetique

Soooo.

It's been about half an hour since I've tried to fall asleep. And it seems Im getting nowhere! Hah, but like that's anything new.

Yesterday was sports day, and to be honest it was pretty fucking embarrassing. I threw up during the 1500 metre race... Twice! Luckily it was during the last lap. But it was still annoying. Especially considering a whole number of people could have seen it too.

After that I had high-jump. Now that was actually something i used to really like to do. 2 years ago. But since then it seems my form has gotten pretty sloppy. The bar also seemed to be a lot harder than past years.. After bashing into it twice for 130 cm and thrice for 140, it actually bruised my back. Hah.

Overall the experience kinda just left me feeling pretty pathetic.. Threw up in front of the whole school, and bruised my back on some tiny yellow rod. Oh well i guess. Its all over now. No room to dwell. But, still. It was pretty sucky.

For some reason today i was really on edge too. I had a mini freak out when this guy came up and touched my shoulders unexpectedly out of nowhere. It just made twitch and then flip out.. Why? Maybe it's stress or something. Anxiety manifestation. Who knows. Maybe i just don't like being randomly touched. I acted pretty strange during band practice too.. And i couldn't quite place a finger on why. But then hey, I was too far gone to stop then and there!
I really wish practice time was longer though. At least an hour. Is that so much to ask? Apparently so.

Well, I'm hoping tomorrow's gonna be fun. It probably will be. Even if I'll be doing something I've never done before...